This is the first in my series of blog posts celebrating my pregnancy as I journaled it through the eyes of my unborn son…
My mommy cries as she holds the second of four pink lines, proving to her that I am real. I know they are tears of joy but I also know she is scared, terrified of losing me. I wish I could tell her how strong I am and how ready I am to be her baby boy but I guess she’ll just have to come to realize that in her own time. Until then, though, I can help remind her everyday just how strong I am.
Today is the perfect day for her to find out she’s carrying me, the day before Mother’s Day! We sit on the edge of the bed as she waits for the results to show, again (this is her third pregnancy test this morning alone J)! When the pink line confirms what she already knows, she throws herself back onto the bed and holds me; well, she holds her belly but I am in here so technically she is holding me. I can feel the relief settle through her body, allowing happiness and excitement to envelope us.
Her first words to me are, “I can’t believe it! I can’t believe I’m pregnant! I am so enamored with you, already, my love, and I will do everything right this time!” She says this with a twinge of regret, as if her previous miscarriages were her fault. They weren’t; it just wasn’t time. All the waiting, and tears, and doubts were to prepare her for me. Now, my mommy will be able to enjoy every single moment of our pregnancy; nothing will be taken for granted!
Just for good measure, though, my mommy gets up to take the last pregnancy test in the box. Four minutes later…yep, another pink line proving that she is, indeed, pregnant and I am strong and healthy! And even though each pink line has shown darker than the first, I can still feel her fear of losing me. It’s okay, though, because she’s going to know, every single day, just how strong and healthy I am!